The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster Essay Example

The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster Paper â€Å"In the beginning there was the Word, and the Word was ‘Arrrgh! ’†. These famous lines taken from Piraticus 13:7 are the first words you will see in the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Many do not know what exactly Pastafarianism is, and so I am here to spread the Word! Pastafarians stand for all that is good, and are against all that is bad. What more could someone ask for? The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, while having existed in secrecy for millions of years only recently came into the mainstream in May of 2005. But what do they stand for, and what exactly are their beliefs? In May of 2005, an open letter to the Kansas School Board from concerned citizen Bobby Henderson sparked the mass intro of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster into our society. Some claimed that the church is purely a thought experiment, satire, illustrating that Intelligent Design is not science, but rather a pseudoscience manufactured by Christians to push Creationism into public schools. But Bobby knew better, and wrote his letter to express his concern. In the words of Bobby Henderson himself, â€Å"With millions, if not thousands, of devout worshippers, the Church of the FSM is widely considered a legitimate religion, even by its opponents – mostly fundamentalist Christians, who have accepted that our God has larger balls than theirs. † A lot of people can’t bring themselves to understand this religion. Before I delve farther into what exactly this religion is, I would like to share what they consider the basic beliefs that they all share. By design, the only dogma allowed in the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is that there is no dogma allowed. We will write a custom essay sample on The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster specifically for you for only $16.38 $13.9/page Order now We will write a custom essay sample on The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster specifically for you FOR ONLY $16.38 $13.9/page Hire Writer We will write a custom essay sample on The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster specifically for you FOR ONLY $16.38 $13.9/page Hire Writer There are absolutely no strict rules and regulations, there are no written rituals and prayers that must be abided by, and every single member gets a say in what the Church is and what it becomes. Due to this, the religion is actually quite difficult to clearly define what the religion is. According to them, they have a set of general beliefs that are as follows. First, they believe that pirates, the original pastafarians, were simply peaceful explorers and that due to Christian misinformation, they received an outlook of outcast criminals. To them, this is completely untrue. Next, they are extremely fond of beer and other alcoholic beverages. To them, this is basically the equivalent of holy water. Every single Friday is a religious holiday and is to be treated as such. Another belief is that they should never take themselves too seriously. This religion wasn’t founded by a group of â€Å"uptight† individuals. Finally, they embrace contradictions. These aforementioned aspects are considered the core beliefs of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. The central belief is that an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster created the  universe  after drinking heavily. According to these beliefs, the Monsters intoxication was the cause for a flawed  Earth. Furthermore, according to Pastafarianism, all evidence for evolution was planted by the Flying Spaghetti Monster in an effort to test Pastafarians faith—parodying certain  biblical literalists. When scientific measurements such as  radiocarbon dating  are taken, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is there changing the results with His Noodly Appendage. The Pastafarian conception of  Heaven  includes a  beer  volcano and a  stripper  factory. The Pastafarian  Hell  is similar, except that the beer is stale and the strippers have  sexually transmitted diseases. According to Pastafarian beliefs,  pirates  are absolute divine beings and the original Pastafarians. Furthermore, Pastafarians believe that pirates image as thieves and outcasts is misinformation spread by Christian theologians in the  Middle Ages  and by  Hare Krishna’s. Instead, Pastafarians believe that they were peace-loving explorers and spreaders of good will who distributed candy to small children, adding that modern pirates are in no way similar to the fun-loving buccaneers from history. In addition, Pastafarians believe that ghost pirates are responsible for all of the mysteriously lost ships and planes of the  Bermuda Triangle. Pastafarians celebrate  International Talk like a Pirate Day on September 19th. The inclusion of pirates in Pastafarianism was part of Hendersons original letter to the Kansas State Board of Education, in an effort to illustrate that†correlation does not imply causation†. Henderson presented the argument that global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters  are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800s.   A chart accompanying the letter shows that as the number of pirates decreased, global temperatures increased. This parodies the suggestion from some religious groups that the high numbers of disasters, famines and wars in the world is due to the lack of respect and worship towards their deity. In 2008, Henderson interpreted the growing pirate activities at the  Gulf of Ade n  as additional support, pointing out that  Somalia  has the highest number of pirates and  the lowest  carbon emissions  of any country. There are 7 occurrences of celebration within the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. The first is Pastover, in which pastafarians around the world are encouraged to eat copious amounts of pasta which is cooked â€Å"in his image† by family members dressed as pirates. A common practice on this day is the passing of the eye patch, in which each family member takes turn wearing the eye patch and explains why he/she is happy to have been â€Å"touched by his noodly appendages†. Next is Ramendan, in which pastafarians are encouraged to eat only ramen noodles and remember their times of eating quality pasta. Then there’s Halloween, a time of remembrance of when Pirates walked the earth freely. A little known fact is that pirates were well known for passing out candy on this day but the practice dwindled as they became more and more persecuted. Next, on September 19th, is International Talk like a Pirate Day, in which pastafarians everywhere are encouraged to return to their pirate ancestor’s native tongue. Another important holiday is Friday. Every Friday, to be exact, is a holiday to the Pastafarians. On this day, they are to pay homage to their beer volcanoes and stripper factories. Finally is Holiday, which basically covers all the commercial holidays. To be a world religion, there are seven things that generally must be met. The first is the experiential aspect in which you look at what that started it all. Although the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster has existed for â€Å"millions, if not thousands† of years, the main point that brought it into the mainstream was Bobby Henderson’s letter to the Kansas School Board expressing his concern about their denial of his alternative theory. From that point on, Pastafarianism exploded into the mainstream, and since then it has only expanded and grown. In fact, according to them, you don’t even have to actually believe in the FSM to be a member. In their own words, â€Å"For the same reason that many in other religions don’t literally believe their scripture, you can be a Pastafarian without being a True Believer of our scripture. In other words, do you know Christians who don’t take the Bible literally – but who consider themselves True Christians, nonetheless? So do I. In fact, True Belief is not often a requirement of religion. Most religions are comprised of a group of people with similar – but not exact – world views. Pastafarianism is no different in that regard. † Next is the aspect involving myth. Here, we examine the storied that aren’t necessarily true scientifically, but convey important truths about life. One example of this is the FSM story of creationism. The story begins with the creation of the universe by an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster. On the first day, the Flying Spaghetti Monster separated the water from the heavens; on the second, because He could not tread water for long and had grown tired of flying, He created the land—complemented by a beer volcano. Satisfied, the Flying Spaghetti Monster overindulged in beer from the beer volcano and woke up hung over. Between drunken nights and clumsy afternoons, the Flying Spaghetti Monster produced seas and land for a second time, accidentally, because he forgot that he created it the day before along with Heaven and a midget, which he named Man. Man and an equally short woman lived happily in the Olive Garden of Eden for some time until the Flying Spaghetti Monster caused a global flood in a cooking accident. This gives us a clear and understandable way to interpret how something as large as the Earth was made. Next is Doctrinal, which involve creeds, gospels, and things of that nature. One way in which the Church of the FSM meets this standard is in its adaptation of the 10 commandments. This gives the pastafarians a clear list of things to do in order to get into Heaven. The story goes that Captain Mosey ascended Mount Salsa and received 10 pieces of advice from the Flying Spaghetti Monster. These pieces of advice are contained in the book known as â€Å"The Eight ‘I’d Really Rather You Didn’ts. † The reason there are only eight is due to the fact that on the way back down from Mount Salsa, Captain Mosey ropped two of them. This event partly accounts for Pastafarians flimsy moral standards. The Flying Spaghetti Monsters commandments address worship of Him, the treatment of people of other faiths, sexual conduct, and nutrition. The fourth aspect is ethical. In this, we examine what the religion says is good or bad. Here, we can again look at the wonderful story of Captain Mosey. Again referring to the â€Å"Eight I’d Really Rather You Didn’ts†, we can get a better picture of their moral code. The first says that they are not to â€Å"act like sanctimonious holier-than-thou people when talking about His Holy Goodness. He goes on to say that if someone doesn’t believe in Him, it is okay. The second says not to use His Noodly Goodness as a means to oppress others. In His words, â€Å"Purity is for drinking water, not people†. Third, he talks about not judging people for the way they look, talk, dress, or choose to live their life. If they want to engage in homosexual relations, let them. â€Å"One is not better than the other, unless were talking about fashion and Im sorry, but I gave that to women and some guys who know the difference between teal and fuchsia. I am not going to go over all eight of them in this paper, but the point is that they do indeed have a set of commandments much like another well-known religion. Next is ritual, in which we look at the varying rituals involved in the Church of the FSM. Actually, there are no mandatory religions involved in the Church of the FSM. However, there are rituals that are encouraged to be practiced during events such as holidays. One o f which I mentioned earlier, in which the passing of the eye patch takes place. Here, each member of the family takes turns wearing the holy eye patch and sharing why he or she is blessed to have been touched by His Noodly Appendages. The fifth aspect is the social aspect. Here, we look at the communities involved within the religion. The Church of the FSM does not have a set, established church anywhere. Instead, they believe that the Earth is their â€Å"church† and that wherever they happen to meet is okay with them, as many of them are â€Å"too lazy to be bothered to get up at seven in the morning and go to some building to be told what to believe†. They do however hold things uch as parades in order to unite together as â€Å"one under His Noodly Appendages†. Finally, there is the material aspect. In the Church of the FSM, one of the Eight I’d Really Rather You Didn’ts is that they are not to spend billions of dollars erecting statues, cathedrals, and other items of worship when the money could go to â€Å"stopping world hunger, healing the sick, helping the homeless, and lowering the cost of cable. † However, there are many pieces of art created by a slew of talented ten year olds that serve to allow His Noodly Appendages to continue to touch those around us for millions of years to come. As we can see, this religion has actually had a huge impact on our society since it went mainstream in 2005. People all over the world are changing to better serve his Holy Goodness and help those around them. If you look at the Church as a whole, not one death has occurred due to it, and â€Å"certainly no wars and slaughters were caused by it, much like another religion†. The FSM has allowed us to take a step back and look at what we believe in, and determine what actually makes sense. By creating a religion completely based off of one guy’s imagination and determination for people to open their eyes and look at what they preach, the Church of the FSM has helped many to become better people, and it will continue to do so throughout the years as more and more people become aware of his Noodly Goodness. Works Cited 1. www. venganza. org. 2. The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Author: Bobby Henderson Published: 2005. 3. http://politics. gather. com/viewArticle. action? articleId=281474976877085 4. http://en. wikipedia. org/wiki/The_Gospel_of_the_Flying_Spaghetti_Monster#Pastafarian_Creation_Myth

How To Start A Niche Blog (And Why You Should)

How To Start A Niche Blog (And Why You Should) You can divide all blogs into two categories: lifestyle blogs and niche blogs. These categories represent two conscious decisions that bloggers can make: Im going to write about everything, or Im going to write about one thing.   Bloggers have 2 choices: Write about everything, or write about one thing. #NicheBloggingNiche blogs are when you write about one thing, and one thing only. They are a blog with a one-track mind, having one purpose, one goal. Why in the world would you ever consider something as unfun as a niche blog?  Because niche blogging is where real traction and traffic happen for a blog. Why You Should Start A Niche Blog As a blog reader I like variety, but when it comes time to save a blogs RSS feed in Feedly for reading and sharing later, I much prefer niche blogs. Niche blogs save me time.  They fit into a specific category and I know that when I want to read on a certain topic, the posts will stay true to the category. I will find content on the topic Im looking for and nothing else. For lifestyle blogs, I end up dumping them into a category I call Random Interesting (yes, I really call it that) and I only venture in there when I have time to kill. Its not that I dont enjoy reading those blogs (I actually do), but when I am pressed for time I dont always have the option to sift through content to find something that might be useful in the moment. I turn to categories that I know will give me what Im looking for. In other words, when it comes time to share content, niche blogs are the workhorse readers turn to. Variety, within boundaries, works. Variety, without boundaries, can be a mess. #NicheBloggingThats great that niche blogs give me, the content curator, an easier day. But what benefits do you, the blogger, get from a niche blog? 1. Niche Blogs Keep You On Track Focus is hard enough when you blog. This is especially true on days when you dont have ideas and are tempted to write about your favorite sports team just this one time. When you have a defined niche, its pretty easy to say no, the NFL doesnt have anything to do with my pastry blog. By knowing the specific topic you are writing about, you actually have more tools available to help get you out of an idea rut. Techniques to break writers block, like brainstorming or a headline storm, are easier when you have boundaries that define where you should operate. Lets consider an example of how the two compare. I have a lifestyle blog and I cant think of anything to write about. Has anything interesting happened to me lately? Have I observed anything interesting about life in general I think people might like to hear about? Have I read anything lately that caught my attention that I could write about for my readers? I have a niche blog about shoes, and I cant think of anything to write about. I can go to my RSS reader and get ideas on my niche topic that are trending right now. I can see which of my old posts are most popular and repurpose them. I can do Google keyword research on shoe-related phrases. I can set up a Google Alert on different shoe-related topics. Neither the lifestyle blog or niche blog is better, but a niche blog has more concrete methods of finding ideas because the topic is restricted. Narrow boundaries keep you from weaving all over the place. Niche blogs make idea and headline generation easier. Boundaries are good.2. Niche Blogs Give You A Reliable Audience I have several personal blogs; a few are niche and a few are without boundaries whatsoever. My main blog is mainly personal, and Ill write on any topic that strikes my fancy. My core readers are those who connect with my personality and as an individual, and not with a specific topic. While that is valid, it isnt a reliable audience that you can build a huge email list or serious traffic on (unless youre already famous). The average blogger isnt generally going to be a mini-star with a huge following that clings to them no matter what they write. A great example is a viral blog post I had recently. The topic of the post was on food and health, and I picked up a lot of email subscribers who were interested in that topic. The next weeks email came out and most of those subscribers went away. Why? Because they thought I was a food blog, and thats what they wanted. A niche blog will give you an audience that you understand, and that understands you. They are less prone to churn. Niche blogs give you an audience that you understand, and that understands you.3. Niche Blogs Make It Easier To Monetize Your Blog Perhaps youve decided youll use advertising on your blog to earn income. Once again, niche blogs for the win. If youre blog is about everything, what ads will you sell? Itll be hit and miss to guess what ads will actually be the most successful. You dont know which topic makes your audience show up and read and therefore, you dont know which ads will interest them. Its also a hard sell to advertisers. They want to know what your blog is about. How do you sell an ad when your blog is about me? The same can be said for ebooks, training, and other items that people use to make money through a blog. How will you choose a topic for an ebook, or training, and know that your readers will buy it, if youre not writing a niche blog? You have no idea what theyd spend money on or like to learn. All you know is that they are willing to come to your blog to hear your random thoughts on all kinds of topics for free. 4. Niche Blogs Expand Your Own Knowledge Blogs that arent niche blogs dont generally do in-depth coverage on a particular topic. Their lifeblood is the variety, and sometimes topic coverage is a bit like skipping stones. Each post glances at the surface of the topic and then moves on to the next topic. Niche blogs, however, encourage in-depth coverage of topics. They have to. Youre only writing about one specific topic and youll naturally dig in deeper and cover details as much as you can because there isnt another topic to bounce on to. For example, if you have a food blog, you wouldnt write just one blog post about whether you should use cold or room temp butter for making a cake and call it done, never to revisit butter temperature again. Instead, you might do a series on how to properly use butter, and that might lead you to do features on more individual ingredients and how they affect your baking. With niche blogs, you dont have to come up with 1000 new ideas. You can start with three and approach them from every angle possible before moving on. A niche blog allows you to do that, but on a general lifestyle blog, youre just going to be seen as strangely obsessive about butter. You dont need 1000 new ideas on a #NicheBlog. A few, from all angles, will do.How To Start A Niche Blog The difference between starting a niche blog and any other blog isnt particularly magical or unusual. It involves research and planning before you jump in and start writing. It involves more than just the decision to start a blog. It requires you to decide to start a blog about ___.  If youre looking for your niche blog to bring in money, youll want to be even more conscientious in your selection of a niche topic. 1. Know Your Passion If you hate vegetables, deciding to write a niche blog about vegetables is a terrible idea. Even if you like vegetables well enough, it still might not be enough. Remember, you are going to be writing heavily about a very focused topic. Thats going to be difficult enough. At least make it easy on yourself and have a serious passionate and interest in your niche. Otherwise, its going to be a very short-lived blog. 2. Decide On Short Or Long Term Trend niche blogs wont last, but they can be profitable for a while. For example, your niche blog might capitalize on a TV show or movie. Once the show is no longer on the air, or the movie buzz has faded, your blog wont be the traffic horse it once was. But that doesnt mean you shouldnt do it. As long as you know, going in, that youre going to be in a bit of a pressure cooker to build traffic quickly, and are ready to capitalize on absolutely every last drop of it before it fades, go ahead. Its the way your entire blog exists by capitalizing on a trend. 3. Decide If And How Youll Monetize Your Site Perhaps youre writing your niche blog for the absolute love of the topic and dont care about bringing in money. Fair enough.  Most people create a niche blog in the hopes of bringing in money, because niche blogs are uniquely able to handle advertising and affiliate marketing very well. Lets say you do want to use affiliate marketing. You will need to pick a niche topic where good affiliate marketing programs and products are available, and youll get paid a decent commission. Youll need to research available affiliate programs and find a reputable one that fits what you need best. Or maybe you want to use advertising. Again, youll need a blog whose topic attracts a specific audience that has advertisers eager to market to them. And, youll need to build up traffic to a certain level before some advertising programs will even consider your blog. Remember to comply with the FTC and disclose on your blog if you decide to use affiliate marketing or paid reviews. Niche blogs are uniquely set up to bring in advertising and affiliate marketing money.4. Find Your Keyword Niche Youve decided youll write about coffee for your niche blog. But coffee is still pretty broad–are you talking about growing coffee? roasting coffee? brewing coffee? fair trade coffee? coffee culture? buying coffee? cooking with coffee? You need to find specific keywords if you want your niche blog to bring in money and traffic. Googles Keyword Planner is the most popular tool, and even though there is no shortage of blog posts telling you how to find the best keywords, you might consider Googles own instructions  on using Keyword Planner, too. Which site will be easier to target with affiliate marketing, advertising, and keywords: A niche blog about photography, or a niche blog about Nikon cameras? Sometimes the extreme niche blog is the way to go when you are looking to monetize your site and find precise keywords that do the heavy lifting. When it comes to traffic and monetizing your blog, the more focused your audience is, the better. 5. Tighten Up Your Current Blog Maybe your current blog went off track and became a blog about everything. How do you turn your blog into a niche blog? Look at your categories. Youll notice that a blog off track often has category and tag bloat. Which category do you seem to write in the most? Thats a good hint at where your passion and interest for blogging lies. Look at your stats. Which of your posts tend to get the most traffic? This is an indicator of why people come to your blog, and it is also an indicator of a post that has done well in search. Dissect the post. Whats the topic? How did you write it? What brings the search engines? Make more posts like this on the most popular topic. Do some pruning. You might consider removing posts that are completely off-topic. If you absolutely must write on more than one topic, why not start a personal blog elsewhere and rehab your current blog into a niche blog? If your blog has been around a while, build on that traffic and following while you regain focus as a niche. Resist that spontaneous post. If you catch yourself feeling like you just have to post a photo and story about your dog and the cute thing he did today, stop. Dont put it on your blog. That is more appropriate for social media, or your personal lifestyle blog. Again, if you must have this outlet, create a personal blog to do it on. Keep your niche blog purely on topic, always. Dont give up on a wayward blog. Even if you havent stayed on topic over the years, its not too late to start. Decide today that you will have a niche blog, and get that mindset in place.